(What really goes on)
Air freshner in raspberry and coconut; Bulldog tied to a pole in the backyard just walk around him; Carpet stain is covered by large pot plant; Do not remove the Dolphin painting in hallway; Elvis statue 1.5 meters in reconstituted brass; Free beer with every caravan run; Going once-twice-going three times-- oh how about we raise another ten grand; Have to sell-divorce pending; Immaculate-ideal-and most of all inexpensive for a reason; Just browsing not accepted; Killer bees nest at rare end of gutter wear a mask when entering; Large water feature with giant vagina shaped purple crystal spraying piece; Magic carpet throughout (so floral that no matter what you spill on it it will not show); when Neighbours don't become good friends; Original 1970s decor; Polished endangered timber floor no stilettos please; Quick! skip over the last few clauses; Repetitive oldies classic radio station shall blast into the receptionist's ears to punish her for being a little smart arse; SOLD! To the large scaley lady at the back in the mullet and tie-dyed flares who resembles Meatloaf; Used house salesman; Vendor is pissed - in more than one way; What part of N-O don't you understand; XXX shop next door; Yank the door bell hard and it will fall off; Zoned for a (very) bad school.
And if you don't believe me: On the first day of work in '08 my colleagues welcomed me back with THIS
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3 comments:
This is why I've applied for a New Zealand work visa.
Your colleagues have quality taste--not many would spring for the "red" label.
A female Meatloaf--that's frightening. Return bat to hell immediately.
Does any actual work get done? Or do you leave it all for the bulldog?
No work gets done (by neither ppl nor animals) - all reliant on foreign labour.
How resourceful.
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